Scary Blog

*IMPORTANT! DO NOT READ IF YOU DO NOT CARE BECAUSE U WILL JUST THINK I AM A FREAK*

sure u wanna read?
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really sure?
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u can still turn back if u change ur mind
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positive?
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okay then.............

here goes:

sometimes life is so depressing. u cant make ur own desisions about things. i hate this world. i wish there wasnt so much pressure on me.

Y DOES EVERYONE ELSE GET TO HAVE FUN WHEN THEY WERE YOUNG AND I WAS THE ONLY ONE STUCK IN MY HOUSE TRYING TO LEARN CHINESE PINYIN?????????????? okay, mum tells me its good for my future and if i work hard now, i will have fun later.

Y DOES EVERYONE GET TO GO OUT ON THE WEEKENDS NOW AND I HAVE TO BE STUCK AT HOME EITHER DOING HOMEWORK OR GOING TO CHINESE SCHOOL AND NORTHSHORE? okay, mum tells me its good for my VCE and if i can get into a good uni, i will have fun later.

but what if in the future.....................

Y DOES EVERYONE GET TO CHOOSE THEIR OWN UNIVERSITIES AND DEGREES AND IM THE ONLY ONE STUCK IN SOME STUPID POSH UNI THAT MY PARENTS CHOSE FOR ME?? okay, mum tells me its good for my future and if i can graduate i will get a good job, then the fun finally begins.

but what if later.............................

Y AM I UNDER SO MUCH PRESSURE TO EARN MONEY AND KEEP UP IN MY WORK AREA? Y MUST I LEARN TO MANIPULATE PEOPLE JUST TO GET WHAT I WANT? Y AM I IN SUCH A STATE THAT I HAVE NO SOCIAL LIFE? okay, mum tells me that if i can find this job i will find a good husband and then i will have fun for the rest of my life.

but what if......................................

Y DID I MARRY THIS PERSON? I DONT LOVE HIM! I WANT TO BE WITH THE ONE I TRULY WANT TO BE WITH! THIS IS SO MUCH TORTURE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ILL NEVER HAVE FUN FOR THE REST OF MY LIVING DAYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i wish i can just jump into a deep freezing lake and dive into the depths and never come back...........................................

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